Though it’s not love it means…something…
Those are words in a DM ‘s song…and are stuck in my mind for a few days now…they come every time I think of men and my relationship with them. Which is not defined in any way, as most relevant issues are usually undefined…Seems to be the case that whatever is alive, must have a movement, an imperfection. As a condition.
I have also chew on Agha’s (God bless him) preference for a few virtues that by chance you happen to seem to have: patience and discipline. I wonder up to what extent what I see as patience in you has more to do with fear turned into self-control…but it is not my command to find out on you…but on myself, as usual. I do not lack of discipline, except for that focused towards “his” command. Our exercises, that I quitted long ago, when I got pregnant of Lucia. However I do understand now his words:
“People obsessed with themselves, with their own personal problems, usually find it hard to understand something that may give them the only key to their permanent freedom. Which is: While they are worried on their own apparent problems, they may be forgetting to pay attention to their work, their Master, and the Community, when the attention to these, is the only thing that may allow them to build up sufficient capacity to solve permanently, their true problems”.
Work here relates only to work on the Tradition (basically, follow a few rules and exercises). I do understand now, because, even though I am still unable to do my work on a regular basis (or even very rarely), I have experienced the difference in the world around me when I am set up in myself and my moment versus “in my problems”.
Wished I could pass on to you a piece of the fullness, blossom I am experiencing lately, and how I see it going out to spring and colours it in the world around us. I never thought I would experience this feeling again. Last time I had it, was the summer I spent with Solaris in Mallorca (1995/96?). If something as beautiful meaningful as what came after that summer comes back to me now…………actually, something that beautiful is coming. I saw it at my hand, although I do not know yet what it is. But it is coming…that’s certain.
And, to end today:
“It is better finding no readers when you write for yourself, than finding multitude of readers but not finding yourself”.
Those are words in a DM ‘s song…and are stuck in my mind for a few days now…they come every time I think of men and my relationship with them. Which is not defined in any way, as most relevant issues are usually undefined…Seems to be the case that whatever is alive, must have a movement, an imperfection. As a condition.
I have also chew on Agha’s (God bless him) preference for a few virtues that by chance you happen to seem to have: patience and discipline. I wonder up to what extent what I see as patience in you has more to do with fear turned into self-control…but it is not my command to find out on you…but on myself, as usual. I do not lack of discipline, except for that focused towards “his” command. Our exercises, that I quitted long ago, when I got pregnant of Lucia. However I do understand now his words:
“People obsessed with themselves, with their own personal problems, usually find it hard to understand something that may give them the only key to their permanent freedom. Which is: While they are worried on their own apparent problems, they may be forgetting to pay attention to their work, their Master, and the Community, when the attention to these, is the only thing that may allow them to build up sufficient capacity to solve permanently, their true problems”.
Work here relates only to work on the Tradition (basically, follow a few rules and exercises). I do understand now, because, even though I am still unable to do my work on a regular basis (or even very rarely), I have experienced the difference in the world around me when I am set up in myself and my moment versus “in my problems”.
Wished I could pass on to you a piece of the fullness, blossom I am experiencing lately, and how I see it going out to spring and colours it in the world around us. I never thought I would experience this feeling again. Last time I had it, was the summer I spent with Solaris in Mallorca (1995/96?). If something as beautiful meaningful as what came after that summer comes back to me now…………actually, something that beautiful is coming. I saw it at my hand, although I do not know yet what it is. But it is coming…that’s certain.
And, to end today:
“It is better finding no readers when you write for yourself, than finding multitude of readers but not finding yourself”.
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